Hi kids!

Jack again.

Let me nutshell the situation for you. I went to meet a friend for dinner at the Golden Corral. For those of you that don’t have Golden Corral restaurants in your area or, have never been; it’s one of those ginormous buffet places. They got like the huge soup and salad bar, the two enormous hot food bars, a dessert bar, the waitress is constantly re-filling your Dr. Pepper and bringing more plates. And here’s the thing, you know you always make a show of eating a plate of salad first. But, you’re going to throw some croutons on there and bacon bits…and the blue cheese dressing, and even though you are just getting the salad for the appearance of propriety, it’s worse than going to Burger King already just with the salad.

And then, you go to get the real food and, they have all these side dishes; macaroni and cheese potatoes au gratin, things like that. And, they have this baked fish, right? But, it’s like three pieces of baked fish that’s looking a little dried out and it’s sitting next to mounds of freshly batter fried cod, and those big onion rings and two kinds of fried shrimp and bodacious fried chicken breasts and fried okra (I love fried okra, can’t stand okra any other way but, fried it’s divine). The whole things is one big, luscious fry fest. Now, are you going to get the baked fish? Who does that?

So, I just decided, I’m going to go on a big fry feed here. I’m going to eat fried food ’til I founder. I mean I ate so much fried stuff that I didn’thave the stones to hit the dessert bar. Not that I’m against topping it all off with a fudge brownie ala mode with sprinkles, M&Ms, chunks of Reese’s and whipped cream, no way! I truly didn’t have room.

But, I digress.

Anyway, I got out to the car, lit a Pall Mall with a stick match because I lost my lighter earlier in the day so, instead of stopping to get a new lighter I’m carrying around a box of stick matches; WTF! And, I pick up the phone and, sure enough, I have a missed call. I don’t recognize the area code so, I’m debating whether or not to check the message because, I’ve already had three calls in the last few days from some guy named Bob Rizzi…ahem..B-O-B..R-I-Z-Z-I…which I know is some bogus name ’cause I looked it up on the Interweb but, I figured what the hell, it’ll give me something to do as I pull out in to traffic so, I checked the message.

Guess what? It was Jayne! Why don’t I know my sister’s area code?

It’s Jayne, and she’s all cheery sounding, “I bought a new computer blah, blah, blah, blah, and I will be on-line as soon as it’s delivered in about a week! Love you, bye!”

A WEEK!

See, I was thinking this was going to be a one off, I’ll slip in here throw some goofy post together, let everyone know Jayne will be back shortly then, everybody goes on with their regular browsing habits kind of deal.

What to do, what to do?

See, I read Jayne’s blog but, she writes about all these movies, books, tech stuff, Jose Feliciano vids, her animals, her marriage, her fiction writing…it’s the kind of stuff her peeps have come to expect, I guess. Memes…I’ve never done one of those, I don’t know anything about any of that stuff. I live alone like a hermit. I don’t go to movies, have pets….

Alright, get it together Jack, these people don’t need to hear about your drab existence.

OK, let’s do a meme! Actually, it’s going to be like a mini meme so’s I can maybe get to know you better. Two questions….

1. What was the last book you read?
2. In your opinion, what is the best movie of all time?

Hold it, hold it. “Of all time”; how pretentious is that? Don’t you hate that? “Of all time”; a little broad wouldn’t you say? Let’s break that down a little, narrow the scope. Let’s say, the best movie in the last 1,000 years. Yeah, that’s better. So, to clarify…

1. What was the last book you read?
2. In your opinion, what is the best movie of the last 1,000 years?

I’ll get the ball rolling.
Last book=”Jingo” by Terry Pratchett
Best movie of the last 1,000 years=”The Treasure of the Sierra Madre”

So jump in! c’mon, humor me. It’s only another several days then we’ll go back to the regularly scheduled programming.