Posts Tagged ‘Harry Potter’

Be Honest


24 Sep

I saw this at Solonor’s Facebook page. I’m spending too much time there. Especially since I linked my blog there.

Anyway, see if you can answer these questions honestly. Honestly, I was expecting more nosy questions, but thought these were pretty mild.

Fill in the answers…honestly…

1. What was the last thing you put in your mouth?
1/4 of Methocarbamol – a muscle relaxant for the mysterious pain in my left side.

2.Where was your profile picture taken?
I don’t use photos of myself. I either turn my artwork into an avatar, or I use the faces of characters from movies or books that I’m currently obsessed with. My current, Facebook avatar is from one of my hand abstract drawings that features eyes. My current Gravatar is… *runs to look* Snape.

3.Can you play Guitar Hero?
Can you play Dueling Banjos? Nooooo.

4.Name someone who made you laugh today?
First Jack, then Tracy, then Mom. Did you know (according to Tracy, the Tennesean) that today is Thursdeh?

5.How late did you stay up last night and why?
Until 3am. That was an early night for me. The med I am taking for pain makes me sleepy so I’ve been taking a lot of spontaneous naps.

6.If you could move somewhere else, would you?
Nope.

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks?
Nope. Hate fireworks. Too loud.

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you?
Let’s see, I think Cindy is the closest in or around Monterey/Carmel.

9. Do you believe ex’s can be friends?
Nope. I have no ex-husbands, but I have a few ex-boyfriends who’d look great with their faces scraped on pavement after I ran a bus over them.

10. How do you feel about Dr Pepper?
He and I parted ways some months ago. It seems he was a contributor to an ulcer that had taken up residence in my stomach lining. We’re polite if we see each other, but we don’t talk, and he was never able to write.

11. When was the last time you cried really hard?
I cried over the frustration of my body turning, once more, against me.

12. Who took your profile picture?
If it’s Snape, we’ll blame Colin Creevy (you have to be up on your Harry Potter lore to know who he is). If it’s a piece of artwork, I drew it.

Claudius - no red-eye13. Who was the last person you took a picture of?
I don’t take photos of people. I think it’s kind of intrusive. And, who knows, there might be something to that “soul stealing” thing the natives whisper about.

14. Was yesterday better than today?
Today is fine.

15. Can you live a day without TV?
Yes. I don’t turn the TV on until about 6pm. These days, it’s mostly noise for the dogs, and company for me when Richard is at work.

6. Are you upset about anything?
I’m doped up with anti-anxiety meds. I’m good.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
Of course.

18. Are you a bad influence?
Not anymore. My last transgression was almost nine years ago when I taught my second cousins (an 8 year old and a 5 year old) to call their father “spango head”.

19. Night out or night in?
Night in. Are you crazy? I’m not stepping out at night, not even to toss something into the recycle bin!

20. What items could you not go without during the day?
My meds. If I’m leaving the house, I gotta have my purse, which has some emergency meds, my wallet, my ID, and my ATM and Credit Card.

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
My dad in Branson, MO hospital. He never really woke up.

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say?
I don’t “text”.

23. How do you feel about your life right now?
Despite the -isms of my body, it’s good.

24. Do you hate anyone?
It’s a waste of energy.

25. If we were to look in your facebook inbox, what would we find?
A whole lotta of invites for Farm stuff, hearts, drinks, flowers and what-not. I ignore them.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass?
Probably not.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before?
I was called a piece of artwork, does that count?

28. What song is stuck in your head?
“Carnival” by Pribek. It’s one of the few I don’t mind having stuck in my head. Something about it just absolutely fascinates me and lately, I can’t end the day without playing it.

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be?
I don’t want anyone knocking on my window at 2am! Richard, though, would like it to be Bigfoot.

30.Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50?
That’s gonna be a bit tough since I don’t have kids.

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow?
Work some more on my chapter-ed fan fic, so I don’t disappoint my readers.

32. Do you think too much or too little?
Thinking works for me. Whether it’s too little or too much… I dunno.

33. Do you smile a lot?
I do. What’s weird, though, is that a lot of times I’m smiling when no one is around.

Shattered


27 Aug

A fictional, little story of someone hurting…

Holes.

No. Not holes, but gaps.

Irregular, undulating. There one minute, gone the next.

I’ve realized that there’s so much that I am missing and I have no idea where to find it. I could easily look everywhere, under this, over that, but what am I looking for? What am I missing?

Incomplete.

Not whole.

I don’t know how to fix what should never have been broken. Bones, yes. Abrasions? Childs play. Cuts, scrapes, bruises… all of them I know how to fix.

This is broken. Me. Fractured? Shattered.

I saw a mirror break once from a single blow. It was a very heavy piece of glass that I struck out in all my rage at. It shattered. That had felt so… very… good.

I remember blushing as a strange feeling, somehow euphoric, yet humming deep in my bones, swept through my veins, every cell. I don’t know what it was, but ever after, when I broke something, I was able to conjure a ghost of that first feeling.

That’s it.

When he kissed me. The same feeling as when the mirror broke. I wanted to be kissed again, and he did so. A sublime moment that I’ve kept hidden away.

It was someone else that kissed me… who shattered me. Such sickness I felt. Such shame. It hurt in my mind, and my body as well. I was able to clean the blood, patch up the many scrapes and scratches… and his hideous bite mark. That took a bit more skill, but I did it.

My body functions, now. Like a robot… a golem? Everything is a routine programmed in my mind. A strong imprint. A script.

I wake in the morning. 8:30am. On the dot.

I then make my ablutions, brush my teeth, and clean my face. I shower every other day.

I choose my clothes from the wardrobe. A simple shirt, a pair of shorts, socks, shoes. For some reason, I get a little mesmerised when I tie my shoes. A little ill.

Knots in the laces.

Knots in the rope that bound my hands.

No. Routine. Back to the script.

Breakfast is next, although food still does not taste right. Ash. Soot. But, I eat because my body needs it.

Homework is simple. Well, homework is never simple, but I like it. I can think about so many other things than the storm of broken shards twirling in my brain like a frightening, menacing, tornado.

Tea is in the afternoon. I don’t really like tea anymore. I hate it, I think. It does taste good, though, and there’s warmth. When we go outside, I dodge the shadows as I grasp at the rays of the sun.

On my face, my limbs… everywhere.

Tea is when we talk. Or I cry. Sometimes I shout. I’ve punched and kicked, but always I am held together by an embrace. Strong arms and hands that are helping me to put the scattered shards back together.

Humpty Dumpty. I have to laugh. If I don’t…

If I don’t…

The Routine. The Script. I have to remember that.

After tea is time for true freedom. That’s when I can go outside, seeking the sun and the blue sky. My guardian comes with me. I think my guardian needs that freedom, the sun, and the sky, too. We don’t talk. We don’t go over my memories.

Bliss.

At night my guardian teaches me in the twilit hours. I’m taught ways to keep myself safe. I’m taught so that what happened will never happen again. I’m taught how to rebuild myself from the broken pieces.

Finally, there is sleep. Sleep means dreams.

Nightmares.

I have yet to sleep the whole night without waking to screams, only to learn later that it was me that was screaming.

Hours turn into days, days turn into weeks. There are steps back, but I am recovering. I am rebuilding.

I am still afraid, but my guardian is with me now. I still see the holes, the gaps, but they are growing smaller. I know what I am looking for, now. Peace. Belonging. Love.

I won’t be alone.

Never again.

~*~*~*~ ~*~*~*~ ~*~*~*~ ~*~*~*~ ~*~*~*~

This is an original story influenced by a very angsty, very well written fan fiction piece called Walk the Shadows. Harry Potter fans will immediately feel that this story is about Harry and Severus Snape, but it isn’t. It is about anyone who has ever been hurt, broken, neglected, or has been lost. Hence, this is NOT a fan fiction piece and will never be posted on a fan fic site.

Ruined Room

Harry Plodder & The Psychotic Riddle


02 Aug

Hmmm, yeah. That title works for me.

Okay. So we went to the sixth Harry Potter movie today: Harry Potter & The Half-Blood Prince. Obviously I was less than impressed. However, I must preface my review of the movie with my thoughts on the sixth book.

harry_potter_half_blood_prince_dumbledore_potterAfter the Order of the Phoenix I was beginning to get tired of JK’s writing and the waste of great characters. (ex: Sirius Black is brought in as a great story plot only to be killed in the 5th book.) When I finished The Half-Blood Prince I was quite confused as to who the hell the Half-Blood Prince was when most a majority of the story was about Voldemort aka Tom Marvolo Riddle. I actually went on the internet to find some clarification on the story and I was surprised to learn that Snape was the Half-Blood Prince. I grabbed the sixth novel and found the chapter (one chapter, guys!!!) that was all about the mysterious Half-Blood Prince.

Time and time again it seems to me that Severus Snape was a pivotal character in these stories. I don’t think anyone who has read the books will disagree with me. Unfortunately, so many possibilities for the character and JK just continued to keep Snape either too far subdued or just downright flat.

Snape wasn’t the only fascinating character to suffer so. Luna Lovegood: it seems like she had a stronger presence in the films than in the books. I also think Harry and Luna were a more likely pairing than Harry and Ginny Weasley.

So, that’s more or less my gripe with the book. Now for the movie.

If you haven’t read any of the books, you aren’t going to be able to understand what the hell’s going on. I read the books and I was just annoyed. Even though the movie basically followed the book, it was flimsy. Too often I felt that much needed plot development was sacrificed so we could see more funny stuff with the students. There are obligatory gloomy shots to remind you that this is no longer a fun fairytale anymore. The kids are growing and Voldemort is out there sucking the life out of all wizardom.

As just a plain old entertaining movie, it’s quite good. Lots of neat CGI work, things being blasted, and a little blood, courtesy of Draco Malfoy.

Lucius MalfoyNow, a few rants:

What the hell was going on with Narcissa Malfoy’s hair?? Blonde and black? Or was that some sort of dead animal on her head?

The Quidditch game was all right, but was it really needed? I would love to have seen more of the Sectumsempra scene – this is where Harry stupidly defends himself with a spell that he has no idea what it’s result is. It ended quite neatly with Snape kneeling beside Draco and healing him, robes billowing, but we totally missed out on Snape getting angry with Harry. Did it not matter that he nearly killed someone? I guess not.

The film also spent an inordinate time on the romances going on. In the books they were more of an afterthought. This move also took away from how serious the film should have been.

Then, there was the finale, the final act, in which Snape winds up killing Dumbledore. A well done scene, more or less, but two scenes reminded me about some of the reasons why I get bothered by the stories (all seven books) at times. Harry is the only one to give chase to the Death Eaters that were smuggled into Hogwarts? How many teachers are there at that damned school? And there were aurors (magical law enforcement) that were as useless as Red Shirts in Star Trek. Not one single adult tried to stop them? The Death Eaters were majorly outnumbered! The second scene that just made my jaw drop was students and staff raising their lit wands (ala rock concert audience lighters) over the dead body of the Headmaster (while Harry is chasing Snape). Again. Why the hell weren’t any of the adults going after the Death Eaters???

*slams head onto desk*

As a devotee of Severus Snape (and his fan fiction life) I was glad to see that Snape had a bit more onscreen time. He was wasted, though, because there weren’t enough scenes between Snape and Harry to confirm why Dumbledore trusted Severus.

I think I’ve about had my fill of Harry Potter movies.

I Have Been Here Before

I am seeking a question.